Funny Groom Speech Example

If you’re looking for inspiration for your Groom speech, an example can help.

Here’s a warm and witty Groom speech written for an imaginary Groom called Scott.

Thank you Mike for your kind toast and for your wonderful speech. To be honest you’ve set the bar quite high there. I thought we agreed you were going to be a bit rubbish to make me look good.

Oh well, soldiering on… Hello everyone! I’m Scott and I’m the Groom. If you didn’t know that already there’s a good chance you’re at the wrong wedding. But you’re here now, so you might as well stay for the cake.

Before I get into the thank yous, I just wanted to say, doesn’t Sarah look absolutely stunning today everyone? I honestly feel like I’ve won the lottery. And not just a two-quid scratchcard – the proper lottery.

Now I know I speak for both of us when I say we’ve had an amazing day so far. We feel very lucky to have so many of our friends and family here so thank you all for coming. I know some of you had a bit of a journey to get here and we really do appreciate it.

As I’m sure you realize, it took a lot of effort from various people to make today happen. For instance, without me going to the trouble of proposing to Sarah, none of this would have been possible. So firstly I’d like to thank me. But also, to Sarah, for saying yes. It wasn’t a foregone conclusion.

But that aside we had a lot of help and support from a number of people and it’s only right to mention a few names.

Firstly, Janet and Mike, Sarah’s Mum and Dad. You’ve both been a huge help during all the preparations and we literally couldn’t have done it without you. Also, thank you for raising such an amazing young woman and for being so welcoming to me despite my footballing allegiances.

Next I want to thank my own Mum and Dad, Robert and Julie. You know I’m not good at speaking from the heart but I love you both to bits. Thank you for all the help and support you’ve given me over the years. I know I’m not always the easiest person to deal with but on the plus side raising me must have been very character-building for you both. No need to thank me for that - you’re welcome.

Moving to Jason, thanks for agreeing to be my Best Man, mate. We’ve known each other since we were five so you couldn’t really say no. Thank you for all the scrapes you’ve got me out of over the years, even though it was you who got me into most of them in the first place.

And thanks for organizing the stag do. I look forward to catching up over a beer so you can tell me where we went and what we did. Things are a little bit hazy…

Anyway mate, we’ve got a little present to say thank you. I hope you like it. Try not to drink it all before your speech.

Thanks to Colin and Steve our wonderful ushers. Great ushing guys. You ushed like champions. So pop up here because we’ve got a couple of gifts for you guys too.

Naomi, thank you for being Sarah’s Maid of Honour and helping keep her calm and sane over the last few days. I know from experience that’s not an easy task. And thanks for organizing a hen do that didn’t involve male strippers or butlers in the buff or anything like that. Or at least, for doing an excellent job of hiding it from me.

Thanks to the other Bridesmaids too, Kelly, Sam and Gabrielle. You all look gorgeous. Am I allowed to say that now? Just the once apparently. Well thanks for all your help and support anyway. We have a little something here for you too.

Finally our sincere thanks to everyone else who helped make today run smoothly. I’d love to mention you all individually but I don’t want this to turn into one of those three-hour Oscar acceptance type speeches.

Now my speech wouldn’t be complete, or indeed my life worth living, if I didn’t say a few words about my amazing new wife Sarah. And just to be completely clear when I say “new wife” that doesn’t mean there was a previous wife just that Sarah’s newly my wife. Anyone want to throw me a lifeline here? No?

Okay. moving on then. As Mike mentioned, Sarah and I met while we were both at Bristol University. I remember it like it was yesterday.

I was in the student bar trying to look intellectual with a glass of red wine and some book from my English Literature course when Sarah turned up with her mates in full rugby kit and proceeded to drink the bar dry to celebrate their latest victory.

Honestly, you don’t know the meaning of love at first sight until you’ve watched a tall blonde down a pint of lager in 10 seconds and then burp her way through “Swing low, sweet chariot.” By the way, please don’t ask her if she can still do it, because she will try to prove she can.

I think technically it was Sarah who made the first move that day by flicking a dry roasted peanut at my head. I took that as a sign to go over and chat her up, pulling out that classic line: “Did you just flick a peanut at my head?”

Despite this intensely romantic first meeting, we didn’t actually get it together as a couple until after university when we both got jobs in London.

We shared some of the same friends and would see each other from time to time at bars and the occasional party.

For a long time I wasn’t even sure that she fancied me. She was always fun to be around but very much like most of the books on my English Lit course, I found her quite difficult to read. I was always on the verge of asking her out on a date but never plucked up the courage. Until one day, when Sarah and I were chatting on the balcony at some house part, she uttered these immortal words: “So, how do you feel about stepping out of the friend zone and into the fun zone?”

And the rest, ladies and gentlemen, is history.

By the way, with all this talk of Sarah being the super-confident one, I just want to make it clear that I’m still the one who wears the trousers in the relationship. Every other Wednesday for an hour and twice on my birthday.

Anyway, I know you’re all keen to hear what Jason has to say about me in his speech - I certainly am - so I’m going to wrap this up shortly. But before I do, I just want to say a few words to this amazing lady beside me.

Sarah, you look absolutely gorgeous today and I’m so proud to be able to call you my wife. I love you for your sense of adventure, your silly jokes, your kindness, your boundless generosity and most of all for being my best friend. You make me happy every single day and I’m looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you.

As tradition dictates, before handing over to Jason – and be kind, Jason, be kind – I’d like to raise a toast to our wonderful Bridesmaids.

So ladies and gentlemen, would you please join me in raising your glasses to… the Bridesmaids!